Jesus prayed for it. The Trinity models it. But how are we as ordinary broken people supposed to achieve it? The Word of God does not leave us without answers in this.
This post will not cover everything that could be said about the matter. But we will try to look at it as concisely as possible so that we can apply the truth of God’s word and be doers, not just hearers! There is hope!! It is possible to be unified and healthy in our relationships with other believers in Jesus Christ.
I loved how Pastor Bob said in his March 29th message on Unity that we stand on the Word of God. This is the first priority in Biblical unity; the Bible!! It means that we agree to agree with the Word and stand as one Body under the Authority of the Word of God.
And then stuff happens. We all fail one another, sometimes sinning against each other or at the very least causing offense to one another. Conflicts arise and there is strife of all kinds in our homes and in our church! Yikes! What about unity now??
Biblical Steps To Unity & Forgiveness
Here are some simple (but hard) steps to restoring relationships that have been strained and broken. As Pastor Bob said in his message, all of them depend on us choosing humility. Not one of them can be effectively done in a spirit of pride.
- First: The first Biblical step is to choose to forgive the offense as Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32)
- Second: The next step is to evaluate yourself and humbly repent and confess any part that you had in the conflict. All of us know this step is crucial, now we must put it into practice.
- Ask yourself: Is there any part of this that I can humbly own as my part? (Matthew 7:3-5)
- At this point, the offended party must decide to go to the person or to let it go. If it is a misunderstanding, a difference of opinion or personality that caused a hurt feeling then we need to “be a duck” and let it roll off us instead of sinking in. (Proverbs 11:19, Colossians 3:13, Ephesians 4:2) It’s wise to remember that when we don’t handle things Biblically at this point, the frustration and hurt can quickly turn to bitterness and envy and every other kind of evil. (James 3:16)
- Third: If a brother has sinned against you, you should go…” (Matthew 18:15) If there is sin involved, go to the one who sinned against you. We must not go to others until we have gone to the one we are in conflict with. There is no place here for slander or gossip that tear down the church and the home! We who have been called to love one another the way Christ loves us, must go in love and make things right between us and other people so that we can worship God with a clean heart. (Matthew 5:23-24)
- Fourth: Finally, go and restore him. (Matthew 18:15) The purpose in going is to restore trust and understanding, not to blame and accuse. We must go humbly, ready to confess our own part in the conflict, to extend and attitude of forgiveness that we decided to give and to graciously go toward that person in love in the hope of restoring the relationship.
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with all men.”
– Romans 12:18
Applying Unity & Forgiveness In The Church
As the church, let’s apply this. Are there any broken relationships in your life? Look back over the instructions the Bible gives us for restoring and enjoying unity with those we love and do life with.
What is your next step?
“Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”
– James 1:22